Restaurant Therapy Part I

Bartending is the poor man's therapy gig. If you don't have the money for numerous degrees in clinical psychology, learn to mix drinks. People will talk about anything once they're seated at a bar rail. I've gotten some pretty crazy life stories out of people: the couple that drove a semi-truck for a living and didn't have a fixed home, the soldier who had just returned from Iraq only to find that the love of his life was leaving him for his best friend, and lots of lonely businessmen that don't have anybody else to talk to.

Today, I found out what it's like to be on the other side of restaurant therapy. I've never had a customer like this before, so I thought, "Finally! Inspiration for my blog!"

A couple of men came in for lunch. They seemed to be in pretty good moods, and they liked to joke around. For the hour that they were at the table, they gave me a hard time about a bunch of different things (they accused me of switching their beers, letting them order too much to eat, etc.--all the while joking about it). At the end of their stay, one of the two starts an interesting conversation with me:

Guy: Can I ask you a question?

Me: Sure...

Guy: Do you have any idea how much you apologize to people?

Me: Well, no. I guess I hadn't realized I did that, but I suppose you're right. I do apologize a lot.

Guy: You've probably apologized to us ten times since we got here. You just apologized for letting us order too much food! We ordered it! It's our fault! You know how to do your job, so don't apologize for yourself!

Me: (awkward silence)

Guy: Have you apologized to that table over there yet?

Me: Oh my God! Yes, I have! I didn't even think about it!

Guy: You see? You apologize too much! Don't do it anymore!

I found out later that this expert restaurant therapist used to work in a restaurant full time, so he was used to giving out advice. Nevertheless, what he said really stuck with me. I realized that I DO apologize too much in many areas of my life--even those that lie outside of waiting tables. All of this led to an empowering day. For the rest of the afternoon, I didn't take shit from anybody, and I didn't apologize at all, either.